I've spent a lot of my life holding that anger and dragging those people around. Saying "forgive" isn't that easy unless we take away the perpetrator's agency. Did they know what they were doing? Did some other force form their life into abuse, anger or competition? Our world is full of systems and accepted behaviors that are 'Generally Regarded as Safe' or normalized; even as those practices exploit mental vulnerabilities(especially ignorance, price or poverty). Some parts of society change with time and effort, but an underlying competitive methodology keeps rebuilding reasons for people with privilege(stronger, richer, meaner) to abuse those without. Few people are really conscious of how little intention we have to work with. Somehow, this helps me let go and "not attribute to malice", but we are living in a world where the mean Mean has most of the means and motives.